Ask Ellyn: 8 questions, 8 answers, 8 days!

You have probably had a couple who has stalled out. There is progress, then regression.

This happens for many reasons: change requires time and developmental evolution; trauma gets triggered and re-triggered; partners don’t take home with them what they learned in therapy; and many more…

So I've created a new series to help you when therapy stalls. In it I cover 8 common problems with 8 specific solutions to keep your work moving forward. It also includes principles and interventions you can apply immediately with your clients.

Here are just a few of the questions from therapists like you that I will be answering:

  • “I have a couple that often regresses into bickering, arguing and blaming. My attempts to have them take turns talking or look at what’s under their defenses seem to go nowhere.  What else can I do?”
  • “After infidelity, I find it hard to help angry, betrayed partners take any accountability in therapy. How do I help them move past so much anger?”
  • “How do I stay focused when couples bring in a new complaint week after week?”

This series is my way of introducing myself and giving you specific interventions that come from the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy. I’d like to give you some practical tools that emerge from a developmental way of thinking.

This series of 8 questions and 8 answers in 8 days won’t even scratch the surface of what’s available in my training program. But it’s free if you just sign up here, and I hope you find it helpful.

Or click Developmental Model to learn about my training program.

Note: Since 1984 Ellyn has trained thousands of therapists from 31 countries around the world. Her  passion is training therapists around the world to become the best couples therapists they can be. She is dedicated to helping prevent premature and unnecessary divorces and sparing couples and their children the pain that reverberates through future generations.

Discover the Last Relationship Training You'll Ever Need

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Dr. Ellyn Bader

Dr. Ellyn Bader is Co-Founder & Director of The Couples Institute and creator of The Developmental Model of Couples Therapy. Ellyn is widely recognized as an expert in couples therapy, and since 2006 she has led innovative online training programs for therapists. Professionals from around the world connect with her through internet, conference calls and blog discussions to study couples therapy. Ellyn’s first book, "In Quest of the Mythical Mate," won the Clark Vincent Award by the California Association of Marriage & Family Therapists for its outstanding contribution to the field of marital therapy and is now in its 18th printing. She has been featured on over 50 radio and television programs including "The Today Show" and "CBS Early Morning News," and she has been quoted in many publications including "The New York Times," "The Oprah Magazine" and "Cosmopolitan."

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